Tag Archive | mymomisafob

bloody bastard

(use dictionary definition #2 for both title words)

mom: you got 18 bug bites?
me: yes
mom: you have to wear mosquito pest.
me: …icide?
mom: yes

KW has identified the culprit, an aZn cityslicker …. not me — the biter!

The Asian tiger mosquito, named for its distinctive black-and-white striped body, is a relatively new species to the U.S. that is more vicious, harder to kill and, unlike most native mosquitoes, bites during the daytime. It also prefers large cities over rural or marshy areas—thus earning the nickname among entomologists as “the urban mosquito.”

“Part of the reason it is called ‘tiger’ is also because it is very aggressive,” says Dina Fonseca, an associate professor of entomology at Rutgers University. “You can try and swat it all you want, but once it’s on you, it doesn’t let go. Even if it goes away, it will be back for a bite.”

hmmph. now i can’t stop…won’t stop…ITCHING.  i wonder if mr. green’s anti-screaming remedy works for itching as well

even after repeated trials, it never seems to fail.

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this just in

mom: do you perm your hair?
me: no
mom: so you have a natural perm?

it’s good to be home / my mom is a fob dot com

me: where is the nearest outlet?
mom: carlsbad
me: no, not premium shopping — i need to plug in my laptop charger.
mom: oh i don’t know. ask your father.

mom: how much was that apple?
me: this one [the one i’m eating]? like a dollar..at the airport.
mom: what a ripoff. 99 cents a pound at ranch 99. and i meant your
apple computer
me: oh…about 1200?
mom: that’s a deal. piao liang [pretty].

mom: can i make you an omelet?
me: YES
mom: i will put in red peppers, olives, silverfish and…
me: silverfish?! do you mean anchovies?
mom: ….yes.

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