best thing i never admitted

currently looping: beyonce – best thing i never had. i really like this song, and i’m embarrassed.

i’m a sucker for a clean, pleasant melody, but no previous pop ‘vice’ has felt nearly as shameful this one. why? could it be because katy perry’s teenage dream, kanye west’s all of the lights, lupe fiasco’s the show goes on, lady gaga’s bad romance, etc. are either pop masterpieces or executed by brilliant performers/geniuses who continually floor me?

this song’s got none of that going for it. but gosh golly, it sure is ‘nice‘. and that’s it — no layers, no linger, not meant to last, yet i loop it to make it last.

could it be because beyonce…i mean, she must be joking, right? is she fo’ realz? wait, let’s take a step back.  is she real? like pink and nelly furtado (whose ‘promiscuous girl’ and ‘say it right’ fall into the same bewildering shallow addiction category here… but in both those instances, i’m comfortable giving real props to timbaland), i just cannot take her seriously. maybe it’s the fact that the accented letter in her name does not fall in the syllable that is emphasized in speech. maybe it’s because ‘best thing i never had’ somehow sounds grammatically incorrect. or maybe it’s because i’ve only ever heard crazy talk from her.

“Sometimes it’s overwhelming. Why did God give me my talent, my gift, my family. But I know you’re not supposed to question God.”

“Y’all are so cute and y’all talk so proper over here. I love England.”

“One of the things that kept me out of trouble was doing something creative — creativity can`t be judged.”

“It doesn’t annoy me, no, because I respect J-Lo. I like her, I think she’s great. And I know that I’m over a decade younger than her, it’s so flattering that I’m so young and people are comparing me to someone who has accomplished so much. But I don’t think I’m like anyone else and really, I’d rather not be compared to anyone else.”

on second thought… i haven’t seen her in real life, could be a hologram.

and why ‘the best thing i never had’? beyonce, you of all people with your many ‘talents’ [air quotes!], have in fact experienced and consumed enough, so that you could have made this song about the best thing you ever had, a touch more positive. is it because you wanted to drop the poetic line, “it sucks to be you right no-owowowowowwww”?

so it is about longing instead, fine. but i also can’t picture beyonce wanting anything, because i mean, what would a hologram want?

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